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26th November 2013: So Unreal

Back in the late 90s, very much unlike now, I used to play first person shooters quite a lot. Duke Nukem 3D, Quake 3 Arena and Unreal Tournament were probably the most popular multiplayer games of that era for my friends and I. At one stage, I got the first Unreal game for free along with a graphics card (ahh, that old Voodoo3), and tried to play through the campaign with my bro and bro-in-law. We got to a map called the Sunspire, and got very stuck in its maze of darkness. I don't know why. Maybe we'd not figured out how to use flashlights or flares, or realised that the default dispersion pistol could be used to light the way. Whatever the reason, we got no further and went back to other games.

And then a couple of weeks back I thought it was about time I got that game finished at last. My bro was up for revisiting Na Pali, so we got it installed and dived in. After a couple of sessions, we were back to the Sunspire, and the Scoob popped round to join us in conquering it at last. It really wasn't that hard after all.

We're now about three quarters through the game, and I'll hopefully be able to tick this one off the list soon.

Ninja Skaarj

Ninja Skaarj

Belly flop

Belly flop

More boobs in a game, and long before The Witcher. Who knew?

More boobs in a game, and long before The Witcher. Who knew?

Weirdest cow-thing ever

Weirdest cow-thing ever

JIK scores a hit on a Titan

JIK scores a hit on a Titan

Evil Geodude

Evil Geodude

I may be about to die...

I may be about to die...

Check out my glowing bowling balls

Check out my glowing bowling balls

Catching them in a crossfire

Catching them in a crossfire

Sneaky scuttler ambush

Sneaky scuttler ambush

Dance Scoob

Dance Scoob

Made it to the top of the Sunspire at last

Made it to the top of the Sunspire at last

Plants growing on wooden floorboards

Plants growing on wooden floorboards

Check out dem dance moves

Check out dem dance moves

Of course, playing the original game got us a taste for some FPS goodness, so we've also been enjoying more madness in UT2004 again:

Looks like I'm going backwards down this hole...

Looks like I'm going backwards down this hole...

Me n Scoob need to quit smoking

Me n Scoob need to quit smoking

I'm not this big-headed, honest

I'm not this big-headed, honest

Boom!

Boom!

Under heavy fire

Under heavy fire

4th November 2013: Turn Off The Light

A couple of months back the Scoob and I were looking for some games to try and take the place of our weekly journey to Valoran and the League. I'd got Torchlight and we gave it a little evaluation to see if it was worth buying number 2, which had a multiplayer mode. Though the sequel has DRM, which I am vehemently against, we really needed something to pass a few hours...
Shortly after, Torchlight 2 was installed and I was making an Outlander named Splap with his chakawary pet Gizmo, joined by Berserker Scoob and his pet wolf called Ragnar.

We set off into the world, and I struggled a lot with the controls at first. Clicking on fast moving enemies was difficult and as a ranged character any misclick would send me running into the melee instead of holding my ground. I had to change all the bindings and install a little program called AutoHotkey to get the desired method of control.

It was not a particularly stable game either. It never crashed or anything, but the lag over the network was evident throughout, even over my LAN, which should not happen. Very often, our avatars on each other's screens, and many of the enemies, would spontaneously jump around the screen as the game tried to keep both computers synchronised. At least, that's what it looked like. Also abilities did not instantly trigger, but there was a short delay which meant timing attacks was hard. Sometimes they didn't trigger at all. Not sure if this is in the game's design, or more lag over the network. It sucked whatever it was.

I don't think either of us payed much attention to the story. It was something about the Alchemist (a playable character from the first game, and the one I had chosen, no less) turning evil and trying to unleash some purple demon things out into the world. Whatever. We just found him and smacked him around the screen. It was very weird after fighting the Alchemist to have to fight more of the netherim, which felt kind of anti-climactic after assuming we had just completed it.
But it's over now. And that's another one down.

Shortly after starting our adventure

Shortly after starting our adventure

Splap scratches his butt

Splap scratches his butt

Anyone wanna play frisbee?

Anyone wanna play frisbee?

We summon some groovy pink skeletons and zombies to help out

We summon some groovy pink skeletons and zombies to help out

Under attack by robot things

Under attack by robot things

Gizmo is so in awe of the Guardian that he sinks into the wall

Gizmo is so in awe of the Guardian that he sinks into the wall

The assault on the Alchemist begins...

The assault on the Alchemist begins...

...who tries to fight back with lasers...

...who tries to fight back with lasers...

...but is ultimately overwhelmed

...but is ultimately overwhelmed

Splapdinkle, before turning evil for the sequel...

Splapdinkle, before turning evil for the sequel...

As I had finished number 2 after only playing about 15 mins of number 1, I decided to go back and try and continue that one. Unfortunately, even using AutoHotkey, I could not get the controls working the way I wanted them. The first game does not give you any in-game method of rebinding keys, and instead you have to edit text files in the game's folders. Even then, there is no way to rebind the actions of the mouse buttons, and there seems to be no way of separating move and attack, which are linked together as one command. I may have still been able to get it to work, but for some reason the Ctrl modifier, which is supposed to only move your character if you click on something that can be attacked or interacted with, does not work in this game like it does in the 2nd. Meaning as a ranged character I would constantly be running into combat if I misclicked. Annoying.
Alas, the adventures of Splapdinkle and his pet ferret Biggles will never be known, unless the game gets patched. Which it definitely will not at this stage.

14th October 2013: Wanna Be Witchin' An' A Ditchin'

So, been trying to play the Witcher at long last, after owning it for over a year. The games in the series have got a good rep out there on t'interwebs as being some of the best RPGs you can play. But unless the 2nd one is much better than this, I will most certainly have to disagree. I'm currently on chapter 4 of 5 chapters, and I'm really struggling to stay with it. The last couple of times I've played I've only managed about 20 minutes each. It's just so frustrating. Here's why:

And this is the enhanced version believe it or not. I'd hate to have played the original. Here's a few images of my adventures so far, as well as some of the interesting bugs:

Strange floating skull

Strange floating skull

Priest's face obscured by random block of concrete

Priest's face obscured by random block of concrete

Kill the evil dog

Kill the evil dog

I think I'm a bit pissed

I think I'm a bit pissed

Priest and fat bloke try and take on a professional killer

Priest and fat bloke try and take on a professional killer

You have no idea kid

You have no idea kid

Weird ghostly apparition

Weird ghostly apparition

Monster waits patiently while I speak to an NPC

Monster waits patiently while I speak to an NPC

Boobs in a computer game. Green boobs no less. Geralt approves.

Boobs in a computer game. Green boobs no less. Geralt approves.

Check out my Matrix moves

Check out my Matrix moves

Dude has trouble getting through a door

Dude has trouble getting through a door

Big bad wolf completely ignores me as I hack it to bits

Big bad wolf completely ignores me as I hack it to bits

These two women keep saying exactly the same thing

These two women keep saying exactly the same thing

Someone else doesn't know how to use doors

Someone else doesn't know how to use doors

Camera does a great job of chopping off this dude's head

Camera does a great job of chopping off this dude's head

Massive scrap breaks out in the sewers

Massive scrap breaks out in the sewers

Helping some naked vampire chicks kill a bunch of religious types

Helping some naked vampire chicks kill a bunch of religious types

Weirdest werewolf ever

Weirdest werewolf ever

Out of the way old woman

Out of the way old woman

Out of the way drunk baffoon

Out of the way drunk baffoon

Yet another patient monster

Yet another patient monster

So are there any good bits? Of course there are. The game wouldn't be so highly respected if there weren't. I'm just too much of a critical douchebag to have really paid them any attention with so many things wrong with the game. The story and characters are indeed pretty cool, even if the game assumes you know the story of the Witcher books and stories. Which of course I don't.

Most of the voice actors also do decent jobs. One in particular sounded very familiar so I looked him up and found out it was none other than Peter Marinker, who did the voice to Doctor Benn from awesome old kids TV show Star Fleet. That's definitely a plus. While I was reading about Star Fleet I also saw that Mark Rolston (Drake from Aliens) did the voice to John Lee?!?!?! What?!?!?!? That is something I can not believe. At all.
I know Star Fleet has nothing to do with this game. But that's what happens when I have such little good to say about it. Oh, the X-Bomber is still the best space ship ever designed. Period.

I'll try my best to finish the game seeing as I've come so far. But it's all very meh at the minute.

29th September 2013: The Last LoL

Pretty much sure I'm done with LoL at long last. I'd mostly played simple games with real life friends to chill out and avoid the very toxic community that is out there. But in a recent patch Riot Games have changed it so you can no longer get experience unless you play proper games with at least 5 players. Pretty dick move forcing you into having to join up with strangers. But hey. The game can go suck it.
Here's the last few images from our more recent adventures.

Fiddles tries to escape

Fiddles tries to escape

Sona farts funny blue squiggles

Sona farts funny blue squiggles

Darius gets his big weapon out

Darius gets his big weapon out

Beatrice ain't scared of any scarecrow

Beatrice ain't scared of any scarecrow

Pile on!

Pile on!

Using Ashe I got my first ever Penta...

Using Ashe I got my first ever Penta...

...so in the next game Scoob went and got two

...so in the next game Scoob went and got two

As we'd been struggling finding new games to play, we tried out some old stuff. First, back on the PS2 there was a Baldur's Gate game called Dark Alliance. While it's a game I finished back then, I never managed on the extreme difficulty. The end boss just killed me over and over. As Scoob had finished it on extreme, we decided to go through it together, confident we could both do it. But it was not to happen, as once at the end we just kept getting murdered, confusing us both.
As we fancied a bit more action RPG, we tried installing Diablo 2, as that is something I've never finished and Scoob's never played. But it just felt so old and bland that we couldn't get into it. Instead, we returned to more recent games and have been playing some Torchlight 2, as well as me finally trying to get through The Witcher. More on those soon...

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