It's been a very long time coming, but at last, nearly half way through the year, I've finally finished my first game of 2025.
To be fair, it was probably well past due that I played this, as GTA5 is a very popular game from 2013, that I imagine the majority of gamers have played by now.
I'd just never really been that interested in playing it before, as the PC version is packed to the gills with different forms of DRM, and to play it on console would require me to use the dreaded controller in a shooter game. Urgh.
But when I saw the PS5 version for just £15, I thought I may as well give it a try. After all, it costs nearly that much whenever I go to KFC these days.
As an added bonus, it would actually give the console something else to do.

In my first mission, I was supposed to look after this car

First thing I did when I got free roam was to go explore

Get your classic hammer. Only 500 dollars. Absolute bargain.

Take a taxi, they said. It will be relaxing, they said.
(webm video)
Despite my lack of interest in playing it, I was not a complete novice when it came to the game and the city it is set in. This is because, back during the winter period in late 2021, I got hooked for a couple of solid months on watching GTA5 roleplayers on Twitch.
There were a bunch of streamers I watched, like uhSnow, Timmac, Silent, and Kyle. I remember I was watching live during the Mary Mushkin rocket launcher incident, and also viewed events from Wolfabelle's perspective during the huge conflict in Sandy Shores when most of the cop players got massacred.
Two of my favourite characters were Crystal and Ka Chao, who were a comedy double act. But the player who has had the longest effect on me is Pinkchyu, who had a character called Selena. This is because she recorded a song for her character to perform in the game called Delirium, which I like so much it's still in my playlist.
However, I only watched it for a couple of months, and looking into the scene now reveals that most of these players and characters are not around any more.
Shame.

Shooting some fool in the throat

Got to go out of the door, to trigger the cutscene of coming in through the door
(webm video)

What an elegant dive into the water
(webm video)

There's something on the wing. It's Trevor.
In this game, you play as three different characters from in and around the city of Los Santos, as they deal with all manner of crooked cops, drug dealers, gangsters, and rich assholes.
It can be played from either a 3rd or 1st person persepctive, which is a choice I always appreciate in games like this.
The game I'd played in the past which was most like this was Saints Row The Third. Which makes sense, as that series is (or was) considered to be a bit of a rip-off of GTA when it first came out.
However, while that other game was pretty much just set in a city, here, the location of Los Santos and the surrounding island is large and impressive, especially for a game that came out so long ago. I really do need to go back and have a look at how it ran on the consoles of the time.

Who says I can't park on the grass?

A few lucky shots make me think I might be getting better at aiming with controller
Hint: I am not
(webm video)

Trevor is highly skilled at getting into vehicles
(webm video)

Just when I thought this wasn't enough like Saints Row
Unlike Saints Row, this thing takes itself quite a bit more seriously, apart from a few ludicrous moments, that is.
I really did miss the wild zaniness of that other game, especially as the setting and characters here are so dark and depressing.
Everyone, and I mean everyone, in this game is a complete arsehole. Thieves, murderers, even torturers at times, I really didn't like any of them. There was no real love for the dialogue, either, as the characters were constantly at each others throats, arguing, calling each other all kinds of racial slurs, and basically just being dicks to one another. I have no idea why they ended up being friends at all.
This is all in stark contrast to the characters in Saints Row, who despite being equally psychotic, were mostly happy in their own ways and were all good friends who actually got along. There was an element of fun to them, you know?
At the end of this game you can make a choice about whether to let one of several different characters die, or have them all band together to take out their collective enemies. And while I knew the game and story were designed to have them all team up, I really did struggle over whether or not to take out the character of Trevor instead. That dude was a vile, disgusting psychopath, and I wish I could have gone and killed him in addition to the other ending.

Some very observant guards
(webm video)

What's this spindly little dude up to?

Feeling like the Terminator
(webm video)

I've not seen Trevor in a while. Let's go check in with him...
(webm video)
Of course, as expected, my main issue was with having to use a controller to play a shooter game with. I seriously just don't get why devs don't put mouse and keyboard into console games, when the consoles themselves have support for these peripherals, and the exact same game on PC always has mouse and keyboard support.
For most of the game, I was aiming manually, and was able to just about struggle through. But for the last few missions I'd had enough and slapped on aim assist just to get through it as fast as possible.
I definitely had other issues with the controls though. The main problem was that I kept forgetting that melee and reload were on the same button, but which one triggered depended on whether you were unarmed or had a gun equipped. So in the middle of a firefight, if an enemy got too close, I'd press the melee button and just end up reloading instead, inevitably leading to my death. I just couldn't get my head around it, and kept messing it up. I know it was mostly my problem, but who the fuck put those 2 controls on the same button?
Outside of the controls, and me arguing with my spaghetti thumbs as usual, by far the main problem was how this game handled the vehicles.
Compared to Saints Row The Third, which was so elegant and easy, here things were a right mess. Cars constantly vanished or despawned, or came back after I'd got rid of them. It was a nightmare.
For one example, there was a mugging. I chased after the guy (in my car), managed to get him out of his car, then chased him down the street about 50 feet. I decked him, got the wallet back, then turned around to see his car still there but mine had despawned.
Another example was a mission where I'd got to kill someone in a hotel. I looked around to where my car had been just seconds ago, and it had despawned again. The map said it was back at the safe house, so I tried to take a cab back there but the quest failed, saying I abandoned the mission. I thought maybe it was because I fast travelled, so instead I tried again without the quick travel but it still said I abandoned it. Grrr.

Did someone paint the parking lines over this tyre?

A Zentorno finally spawns right near the end of the game

In a firefight with the guards as we try to steal all the gold

Making our way to my very discreet getaway car
These examples were only the tip of the iceberg when it came to how shit this game is when handling the storage of your vehicles. And it's such a shame, because in Saints Row The Third this was one of the best parts of the game for me. I loved stealing and doing cars up, then stashing them in the garage, and I enjoyed that here too, except for the fact that the damn things kept going missing.
You can click the following button to read about the crazy shit that went on during my playthrough:
Show / hide storage woes
Franklin's Bike
Pretty early on in the game, Franklin's mate gives him a motorbike that he stole. I thought this bike was pretty crappy, and decided I didn't want it.
So I went on a mission to get rid of that thing, and learned you could apparently delete vehicles by getting rid of them, blowing them up, and replacing them in your character's garage.
But this was all before I realised that some of the vehicles in the game are linked to the story and pretty much stick around just like the characters do.
At first, I just started dumping it down the street, but it kept coming back. Then I rode it into the ocean, but it came back.

Getting the bike all wet

But back it comes again
Then I kicked it into the ocean, but it came back.

Just get out of my life you dumb-looking thing
(webm video)

Guess not
So then I blew it up. But as you may have guessed, it came back.

Blow my bike into pieces. This is my last resort.
(webm video)

Here it is again, good as new
In the end, I gave up completely, and decided to modify it so it to remove as much derp as possible.

I give up
The Duke O'Death
At one point, while controlling Michael, I came upon a "Mad-Maxy" looking car called the Duke O'Death. After stealing it and escaping from a bunch of hoodlums, I found myself in a bit of a pickle.

What do we have here?
See, I was at a part of the story where Michael and Trevor had been chased out of the city, and any attempt to return would see loads of enemies spawn and try and kill me. But I really wanted to keep this car and get it into storage.
The problem was, Michael's home garage was already full, and I had not yet purchaced the extra garage in the city.
For the time being, Michael's safe house was Trevor's place in Sandy Shores, and the garage was empty. So I stuck it in there.
When the story continued, and Michael and Trevor were allowed back into the city, I went back to Trevor's place to get the car, but the garage door wouldn't open as this was no longer Michael's safe house.

Let me in, damn it
(webm video)
Cue a comedy skit where I had to keep quick-switching between Michael and Trevor so that Trevor could get the car out, then let Michael get in and drive it away. Trust me, it was not as easy as it sounds. Any time I would switch back to Michael, the AI would quickly have Trevor run back to the car and get it in first. And when I switched to Trevor the AI would control Michael and just have him keep walking further away so I would have to run him back.

Finally beating Trevor back to the car
(webm video)
Then I went back to the city, bought the new garage and stored the car. But the Duke O'Death's story didn't end there...
Attack Of The Clones
After sorting out the Duke O'Death issues and returning to Michael's home, I was hit with the revelation that the two cars that had been in his garage were now missing.

Why's the garage empty?
Thanks, game.
I thought maybe these cars might be in the impound, which I had not used yet, but all Michael found there was one of Franklin's cars for some reason.

This is definitely not Michael's
I returned this car to Franklin, but when I put it in the garage it was already in there so now he has 2 exact copies.

Franklin sees double
Trevor had a very funny pink sports car that I found with him when initially driving into the city. But I found this was also gone now the access to that safe house was taken away. So I also checked the impound for him, and only went and found another copy of the Duke O'Death, which was always Michael's.

Trevor gets a free Duke O'Death
After storing this for Trev, I thought maybe Franklin's impound might have Michael's cars, but unfortunately I only found the very discreet getaway car I'd plated in chrome from an earlier mission.
A little later, I'd got a new car for Trevor just as the story had him taking over the strip club. A message clearly stated cars parked at the strip club would be saved. However, when I went back, that car was not there. So off I went to the impound again to see if it was there, but it was not.
And for some weird reason, there was yet another Duke O'Death. So I got this out and went to store it, expecting Trevor to now have two in his garage, but for some reason there were now three.

And another?

Damn things are multiplying
Just what the hell happens with the cars in this game?